Wednesday, July 9, 2008

georgia rule and babel are two of the worst movies ever.

I just watched these abominations. Don't make the same mistake I did...

Georgia Rule
stars Lindsay Lohan, Jane Fonda and that nameless blonde woman from Desperate Housewives, all in the same movie. WTF. Clearly, the director saw his list of leading ladies (alliteration! $$$!!), realized he was doomed and desperately tried to throw in substance abuse and repressed memories of childhood molestation wherever he could to try and beef it up. Oh, and there's also a lovesick mormon heart-throb to ice the cake. Also, Lindsay Lohan plays a huge slut (a tough role for her) and wears white outfits in pretty much every scene of the movie... maybe they were going for subtle irony? I kept waiting for it to get good, or at least have a single good scene, and it never happened. Garry Marshall: please give me back the hour of my life you stole.

Babel is a Crash wannabe to the extreme. This movie is proof that even casting Brad Pitt AND Cate Blanchett, combined with focusing on current issues like globalization and the middle east won't make your movie good. It's really weird too, because so much is always happening (at varying world locations) and then nothing is really accomplished or explained at the end of the film. I actually hated this movie a tiny bit more than I hated Georgia Rule. This is mainly because while Georgia Rule was pre-destined to be terrible, Babel had the facade of a deep, "ah ha" movie, and if you weren't paying attention, you might be tricked into believing it made ANY sense at all. Or if you're an idiot. You also have to watch the entire thing, because you keep thinking it's going to come together at the end, and it doesn't.
Confusing plotline + unresolved conflict + naked asian = failure.

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