I finally made the expedition to New Jersey. I loved it! I know you probably think it's silly, how excited I am about a place that cares so much about hair gel, nail care and Bruce Springsteen, but it was a dream of mine, and I made it happen. I did go to a wonderful birthday party that catered to my every whim, where I met some of the nicest people, but who cares about that!
Here are some highlights of my trip that I witnessed simply sitting a casual, neighborhood pizza joint:
-A few different tween boys that could have easily, right there on the spot, broken out in song and probs started a successful pop career. I watched one for awhile, hoping it would happen but I ended up disappointed, and somehow, thirsty.
-VERY fit man in VERY skimpy tank top and VERY tight jeanz. And he was straight! My mind and soul crumpled up a little... and then uncrumpled as I watched him binge eat three enormous slices of pizza, which was impressive... and totally bulimz.
-Lady whose hair would have def tried to attack/eat me, had I not stayed carefully 3 tables away. I feel very confident it was expanding as I observed it. Also, she had dark brown lip-liner on and totally loved spray tans.
This is the best part of all... the part that summarizes The Garden State for me in one simple, $1.00 package. We were casually shopping for some party favors, and stumbled upon....
...press-on fake TOENAILS.
loves Jersey. Da end.
p.s. happy 21st birthday Leeor!
& yo yo yo, Keith.