Sunday, September 21, 2008


So it's Sunday night: I'm eating ice cream and channel surfing. I stumble upon TLC, where I see, to my gag reflex's great dismay, a 750-pound man.

I stared in horror as they gave background on this dude:

-He weighed 100 lbs in FIRST GRADE.
-He is married to a toothless lady. She is really skinny though... only weighing in at around 350 lbs.
-He was recently taken to a specialty obesity clinic in New York in a recovery attempt. Mode of transportation? Whale sling. Casually borrowed from the nearest aquarium.

Needless to say, I put my ice cream down immediately, and barfed forever. This dude cannot walk, and he's whining to the nutritionist that he needs to have his Sun Chips by his hospital bedside table. And when one of the head doctors informed him that he was diabetic, he asked if he could still keep his lifesavers... "Because [he's] a huge snacker."
I had to change the channel.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

HALF TON MAN! he's an asshole